I used to daydream when I was a teenager. It was mostly about meeting some famous man who would fall in love with me and take me away. As I became older, the famous man dwindled into an unknown man, yet still glamorous in my imagination. We would get married and live a grand life. People would look up to me because I had so much style and grace. I wanted to be adored.

I think this is the general feeling of most young women between their mid teenage years to their twenties or sometimes even forties. I know the reasons for myself but I don’t want to assume that I know the reasons for every girl. My daydreams were a result of early trauma, where I knew what it felt like to have friends and then all of the sudden they were all gone. Everything about my life was turned completely upside down and I had had lost not only my friends, but my home and my self-esteem. So, a daydream of some glamorous man to fall in love with me and take me away from the troubles of life and give me the life of a princess was a good, but brief, escape.

Since then, I have made a few realizations. First of all, I find it much more comforting to be the one behind the scenes and not the one garnering all the attention. Living a princess-life would not be good for me. Second, a man who comes to take you away from all of your troubles will eventually expect you to dote on him the way you daydreamed about him doting on you. That’s just how it works. If you have a strong relationship, the two of you will dote on each other and enjoy both the giving and receiving. By the way, if you have that kind of relationship, consider yourself rich. Third, being served is not the epitome of life. Instead, serving others is.

Luke 22:25-26 And He said to them, “The kings of the Gentiles exercise lordship over them, and those who exercise authority over them are called ‘benefactors’. But not so among you; on the contrary, he who is greatest among you, let him be as the younger, and he who governs as he who serves.”

John 13:5 After that, He poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet, and to wipe them with the towel with which He was girded.

Jesus not only told His followers about serving others, He provided the example as well. Here was a Man who practiced what He preached. He was the only one who could demonstrate what being truly at peace looked like. He was the one who was able to show the world how to fully rely on God even in the midst of facing death.

Serving others is not demeaning. It’s uplifting. To be served, when you look at it from this perspective, is to be dependent, needful. To serve is to demonstrate a strength that others will respect. Maybe not immediately, but eventually. Serving is our purpose in life, whether we want to recognize it or not, it’s the truth. We were not put here to have others wipe our butts for us, but to provide for those who have little to nothing. This will give the ultimate satisfaction in our lives that no amount of money could buy and no glamorous man could provide.

After all, Jesus said, “Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.” (John 13:34) If He could do it,  why can’t we?


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