Mysterious or Just Over My Head?

I have been contemplating this theory for over a week trying to figure out how to put it in words.  I’m not so confident I will be successful, but here goes…

I couple of weeks ago I was walking outside and looked up at the clear, blue sky.  It was at that moment that the weight of gravity really beared down on me and I realized that beyond that beautiful blue is endless space full of planets, stars, suns, galaxies, and billions of other creations that I will never be able to imagine on my own.  Realizing this, I wondered in amazement at my own sense of self worth and saw that I was overpricing myself.  But, by the same token, God tells me that He values me over it all, enough to send His one and only Son to suffer all the things that I should suffer in order to save me.

I’ve been reading the scriptures that talk about the mystery of God’s wisdom and His plans for us, but I cannot find anything that talks about how mysterious it is that we (humans) are so arrogant that we put our selfish desires before everything else.  We talk a big story about how we pray for others and try to help others, but deep down, we really only do what’s comfortable in order to make it look to others that we are sacrificing.  We totally lack humility, me especially.

This is a theory I have been trying to concentrate on every day since I first thought of it because I believe it takes meditation on these things, backing it up with God’s word, to really get it to dwell in my heart.  The only scripture that continues to come to my mind focuses on people and how we are in modern times.

1 Timothy 3:2-5  “For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away!”

Wow.  That describes most everyone I know, including myself.  How does that make me feel?  Shamed and guilty.  But that’s not what God wants me to feel.  How do I know this?  I look up into the clear blue sky and His reality hits me again like a ton of bricks.  I am humbled beyond words and all I can think of is how glorious He really is.  I am so small and insignificant, but He cares for me as if I were as big as a galaxy.  That’s the mystery, if you ask me.  Why would God, Who is bigger that everything, still have the forethought to create me, love me and provide for me, when all I do is live my life for myself and not for Him?  It’s no wonder so many catastrophes and tragedies are happening and increasing in frequency.  Our obstinance is blocking all the opportunities for Him to show His love for us and then we turn around and blame Him.  That is definitely the mystery, but at least now it’s no longer over my head.

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